WICKEDFUL

Missing You

2011-08-30T11:15:00.003-07:00

I feel a little depressed. I miss having my DSLR. I see all these random things I want to take a picture of and I don't have my camera slung across my back anymore. :(

I am going to try and save up money so that I can buy my Nikon again. Maybe I'll just get a D90 this time. I don't want anything too fancy. I was perfectly content when I had my D70. It was my baby. But going with a D90 would be perfect for me. Hopefully they are still around when I finally decide to buy one.

I miss you NIKON D70!! MISS YOU SO MUCH!!

Photo Love

2011-08-28T19:54:00.002-07:00

Up. My official photoblog is up. The layout is super simple because I don't think it should be super fancy or anything. It's going to be so easy for me to post up pictures anytime too since there is Wordpress for my phone AND my itouch! Yay! I should have no reason to be lazy and not update for more than 2-3 days. LOL.

Diabetic

2011-08-26T13:14:00.003-07:00

Oh man. My brother is diabetic. At least the doctor said that he's still young enough that it can be corrected. Hopefully it will be.

Doctor said that most people with big bellies and are just fat in general have higher risk of diabetes. That would mean I fall in that category. I need to start losing weight now. Don't want to be diabetic.

It's kinda scary. My grandmother was diabetic and now my brother ... don't want to be next.

There you Go

2011-08-26T12:37:00.002-07:00

Well ... I did it anyway. I set up a new subdomain on my domain and made a new site for my photoblog.

It will be http://photolove.wickedful.org Nothing is set up yet because I still want to plan everything out on how it will look and stuff.

Hopefully to set everything up soon. I might start it from scratch though and start putting up brand new photos and not transfer any of my old blogger anymore. We will see.

Move Photos

2011-08-26T09:40:00.002-07:00

I am thinking of moving my photo-blog onto my domain since I have an idea now of how much prettier it can look since I discovered the wonderful plugin on wordpress that is - LIGHTBOX-2. Beautiful.

Only problem is to find the time and research on how to properly do all this. Do I need to re-install wordpress on a sub-domain? or figure out something on a subfolder? I have no clue what I am doing LOL.

I'll figure something out.

They don't have it?!?!

2011-08-25T08:03:00.003-07:00

I'm disappointed. Went to Walmart last night and saw that they don't have the gift I wanted to give my boyfriend anymore!!! What am I going to do?!?! I'm going to go and look at every store that could possibly have it because I just HAVE to give that as my gift!

He would really LOVE LOVE LOVE that gift and I want to see his face light up when I give it to him.

I hope I can find it!!!

Rain

2011-08-22T09:43:00.004-07:00

Here it is. It has finally come ... unexpected, unwanted, hated. It hasn't rained in ages like this. It was strange waking up to darkness in the morning and seeing nothing but the pitter patter on the ground. It was kind of deafening. That's how long it has been since I have seen rain like this.

Of course, I had to walk to my car a bit down the street and I forgot to bring an umbrella. Now I am sneezing and my nose always feels like there's tickles inside. That's not good. I popped a couple of dayquils and I hope that will subside down any possibilities of dreadfulness.

Official

2011-08-22T01:28:00.000-07:00

YUP. It's official. I am now "living with my boyfriend". Never thought I would ever say that. At least my parents were ok with it. At least it seems so.

Don't worry Mom and Pops. I'll be fine. I will work hard in school, finish early and be prove that I will be good here.

I will miss you guys though!! At least you guys are so close by so I can always see you guys whenever I want!! LOVE YOU!

Countdown

2011-08-19T13:50:00.001-07:00

T minus 17 days ... until a new part of my life begins.

Cooking Mama

2011-08-19T11:31:00.003-07:00

I have a lot of recipes in my mind that I want to cook and try out and see if I am good at creating some recipes.

I have a lot of crazy grilled sandwich ideas in my head.
I definitely want to cook some pasta.
I want to try baking a lasagna for the very first time.

I don't know which one to pick! I am planning on cooking tomorrow since my boyfriend is as work and I have the day to myself. I'll drop some hints on him and maybe he wil hint back.

Whichever ones I don't use maybe I can cook on his birthday!!!

Month-Sary

2011-08-19T10:01:00.002-07:00

Happy Month-sary to my boyfriend and I! That makes it 5 years and 2 months to this day.

We just like to declare it but we have pretty much made this deal that "monthsaries" are not THAT important. Half the time I even forget what day it is hahahaha.

Unexpected

2011-08-18T16:00:00.002-07:00

Did I just do that? Did I just do it so non-chalantly too? To my mother out of all people ...

Well there you go ... at least one of two of my parents now know that I am officially moving in with my boyfriend.

Now ... have to talk to Dad. That's going to be heartbreaking. My dad misses me so much.

Birthday Gift!

2011-08-17T08:16:00.002-07:00

I have this great idea for a birthday gift for my boyfriend!

I am just hoping I have enough money for it ...
Or that I can find some time to get it because it's all the way at the Walmart in New West ...
I can go on a weekend since he works weekends ...
I can bring Kari with me so that I have some company ...

PERFECT. Sounds like a plan.

What Has Music Come To?

2011-08-16T09:56:00.002-07:00

Been listing to the radio and has come to the realization of why our generation is not going to get any smarter and/or getting dumber and dumber.

Music lyrics as of late is a good example of how lame some people are nowadays:

"Let's play. I'll let you wrestle me. I'll let you win all day".

Really? Really?! That's classified as lyrics nowadays? REALLY?! Wow ... my future 5 year-old kids are going to look back at my music in the future and say, "What the hell do you guys listen to? I can write that!"

What happened to good music? What happened to simple lyrics but with amazing passion and meaning with an incredible beat and rhythm that is original and to their own?

[NOTE] I think I just found my next blog entry[/NOTE]

Lack of Inspiration

2011-08-16T09:07:00.003-07:00

I forgot to bring my Hello Kitty pens and pencils to work today =( At least there's always tomorrow.

I don't know what it is. I have been having a lot of trouble figuring out what to blog about lately on my domain. I want to write with substance and meaning and I have no inspiration at the moment. I mean I have this blogger to write about the sporatic moments in thoughts but my domain is for my actual blogging entries. I am lacking in what I should be blogging about though.

It's not that I do not have enough excitement or daily adventures in my life ... I just have no sense of creativity or inspiration.

Something will come to me ... eventually ...

Hello Kitty - Ness

2011-08-15T14:48:00.002-07:00

Don't know what came over me suddenly but my obsession for Hello Kitty just kicked up a notch. I started up my Hello Kitty Blog again.

I also want to bring all of my Hello Kitty pens and pencils to work tomorrow just so I can break them in ...

Surprise!

2011-08-11T15:55:00.003-07:00

That was sweet. Very sweet. My boyfriend decided to stop by my work and give me AND my mom flowers. I love the card little card that was given with the flowers too.

"Thanks for being you. Love forever!!"

LOL I taped up the card to the wall in my office at work.
How could you not love this man?!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Doubled

2011-08-11T09:40:00.002-07:00

Yay! I finally got to experience doubling on a motorcyle! It was only for like 2 mins from the parking lot to the apartment building but I loved it! 2 things though:

1. do not wear flip flops on next ride
2. wear a backpack and not a purse on next ride

Cannot wait for next ride. Hope we get to have a ride day with Shaun and Angeli. That would be fun. Downtown ride guys? Let's go before the season is over!!

Lightbulb

2011-08-10T12:37:00.002-07:00

I have a great idea for a new layout for my domain!! It's going to be very simple but pretty!

Now let's hope that the coding works out because that's what becomes the bane of my existense.

Ridin'

2011-08-10T08:24:00.001-07:00

O man!! A helmet. A pretty red and white helmet with a phoenix on the sides. It fits me perfectly too. Can't use it for a while though. He's gotta get used to it first before I even get to hop on. Excited though.

Domain

2011-08-09T14:57:00.002-07:00

Why does it do that all the time? My domain will work for days and then all of a sudden "it is experiencing problems" and you can't get to it whatsoever. WTF? That really sucks!! I wanted to finally update some stuff and I can't even get to it. BOO-URNS.

If my baby has a fun joyride tonight and I get to stay home ... maybe ... I'll work on a brand new layout for my domain. I'll be happy!

Butterflies

2011-08-09T11:14:00.001-07:00

School is a month away. I get butterflies everytime I think about it. I'm so nervous. If I am like this now ... imagine when it's already September! I'll be a wreck!!

Motor Love

2011-08-09T11:09:00.001-07:00

Excited for my babay! I will pray that you are careful with it everyday though. Please be safe. That's a whole lot of bike. But you look incredibly sexy on it ;P

Stress Case

2011-08-08T09:18:00.002-07:00

An advisor from school finally contacted me back about my questions regarding finishing my program in 2 years in 5 semesters.

Without giving out the useless details, it turns out, I had nothing to worry about. It turns out, regardless of what I had planned so far, I will actually finish right on time NOT early. Which is okay with me HAHA. I just didn't want to take 5 courses per semester. I would go insane.

Good. That puts my mind at ease a bit for now.

Coffee Mix-up

2011-08-08T08:38:00.002-07:00

As I said, I've been doing pretty good so far with this whole tea thing. I still have a coffee addiction though. I am just in love with my Tim Horton's triple triple in the morning before work.

Since I am trying not to drink so much coffee and more tea, I only asked for a medium this morning instead of my regular extra-large.

They accidentally made a large and decided to give it to me anyway.

In the grand scheme of things ... I wonder what this means?

Green Tea

2011-08-07T12:43:00.004-07:00

I have finally started to start drinking Green Tea again. I remember I always drank green tea everyday 3-4 times a day a few years ago and it really helped maintain my weight. Hopefully it will help me again this time around. I have already had 2 cups this morning. I'm off to a good start!

Slacking

2011-08-05T08:55:00.002-07:00

I have been slacking. I haven't been taking as much pictures as I should be and I haven't been updating my photo-blog. It's just hard because my boyfriend's internet kinda sucks since apparently there's an internet problem with the whole building and even the internet company can't do much about it.

Hum-bug.

I'll do what I can. Oh wait! I'm going to be at my parent's house on Saturday! I can update like crazy! Yay!!

Degree

2011-08-05T08:33:00.003-07:00

I was researching last night on what I would have to do if I wanted my bachelors degree in BBA - accounting. It seems I have to pretty much do another 120 credits (that's about 40 more courses) to achieve a degree. It said there "Years 3 and 4" ... I don't know how you can finish 40 (or even 40-something courses) in 2 years. That's a lot. I'm guessing it would take me another good 3 years to get a degree with only comfortably 4 courses a semester. That's crazy. Something to think about though.

Not yet though.

1. Finish accounting diploma first.
2. Get a job.
3. THEN ... think about whether I should finish my education by getting my degree or not.

Busy Busy

2011-08-04T11:51:00.002-07:00

Busy day today at work. It seems my boss really wants me to get as much done as I can before I go back to school. HER boss is asking though when I'm starting school ... I wonder what that means ... Does it mean that they HAVE to hustle in hiring someone by September or does that mean they just have to know how much they have to hustle to get some work done?

No clue. But it's kinda bugging me.

Possible?

2011-08-04T09:22:00.002-07:00

Possible semester planning to finish my program in under 2 years. Is 5 semesters considered under 2 years? If it is ... then I am GOLDEN. Hopefully it all works out. Or I could just stop being neurotic and fucking talk to an advisor in September. I am worrying wayy too much.

Sept 2011
ACCT 1110 - Principles of Accounting I
ACCT 1130 - Business Mathematics OR BUQU 1130 - Business Mathematics
CBSY 1105 - Introduction to Microcomputer Processing
ECON 1150 - Principles of Microeconomics

Jan 2012
ACCT 1210 - Principles of Accounting II
ACCT 1230 - Business Statistics OR BUQU 1230 - Business Statistics
ECON 1250 - Principles of Macroeconomics
CBSY 2205 - Computers and Information Processing

May 2012
ACCT 3310 - Intermediate Financial Accounting I
ACCT 3320 - Introductory Management Accounting II
ACCT 3335 - Taxation

Sept 2012
ACCT 3410 - Intermediate Financial Accounting II
ACCT 3420 - Advanced Management Accounting
ACCT 3380 - Managerial Finance
ACCT 3444 - Auditing

Jan 2013
BUSI 1215 - Organizational Behaviour I
BUSI 2390 - Business Law
CMNS 1140 - Introduction to Professional Communication
Elective (?? do I need it?)

Ideas, Ideas

2011-08-03T14:26:00.002-07:00

I don't know what to do with this blogger blog. I'm trying to think of ideas.

1) turn it into a continuous 30-day-challenge blog?

2) write and review products I've used?

3) restaurant/food critique?

4) write letters to anything and anyone

5) a collection of memories written in story form.

I have no clue ... or I can just keep this as my random blog since I already have a main blog ... what do I do???

Insomnia?

2011-07-10T00:29:00.001-07:00

I don't know if it's because I consumed a lot of Coca-Cola today but it's past midnight and I still am not even close to being sleepy. What is going on here?

Romeo Must Die

2011-07-09T23:46:00.002-07:00

It's such a trip to watch a movie knowing that the city they are "in" is really Vancouver because I know every spot they are in and yet they say they are in "California".

In regards to the movie "Romeo Must Die". A nostalgic movie that makes me realize how some parts of Vancouver is actually quite pretty! Plus ... Jet Li kicks ass and Russell Wong is hot!

Late Night Eats

2011-07-09T23:41:00.002-07:00

Why do I always get hungry so late at night? I have some amazing baked macaroni in the kitchen ... that would be too many helpings already for the day ... it would be a mild heart attack waiting to happen.

I don't think this whole Mediterranean Diet thing is gonna work out.

New Look

2011-06-27T10:35:00.003-07:00

I love my new haircut. I always forget that I can pull off shorter hair. I guess I just always have this mentality that longer hair "looks prettier" but it all really depends on how you carry it. I find that I carry shorter hair a lot better than longer hair.

I have realized one more thing though ... Now ... I look even more like my mom. I guess that's not so bad.

Cabin Fever

2011-06-22T10:42:00.002-07:00

This is what I asked for. I am working in an office. I am getting paid ...

Staring outside the window the day after the official arrival of summer is making me feel like I should be laying on a large patch of grass somewhere watching the clouds with someone close.

I am working in an office.

I am coughing up a lung because I am still getting over a cold. It's affecting my eyes since they are dry, sore, and burning. Only in the office though. Once I'm outside my eyes are fun. I would rather them be blinded by the sun at this moment.

I am working in an office.

5 more hours to go before I get some temporary freedom.

I am working in an office.

Bruno Mars

2011-06-04T09:43:00.001-07:00

Damn boy, you can fucking sing! Come back again to Vancouver so I can hear that sexy damn voice of yours and make me swoon!

Registration

2011-06-03T15:51:00.000-07:00

5 mins. 5 mins to registering for my new career! Go accounting!!

YEAAH!!

2011-06-03T15:50:00.002-07:00

BRUNO MARS CONCERT TONIGHT!! So excited! One of the best birthday/anniversary gifts ever!! Great way to celebrate our pre-5-year anniversary together!

Acceptance

2011-05-18T17:29:00.003-07:00

"Congratulations and welcome! You have been admitted to Kwantlen Polytechnic University in the Diploma in Accounting program for the Fall 2011 semester".

I feel pretty damn excited right now. :D

Japanese Food

2011-05-05T11:32:00.000-07:00

Japanese food is heaven. That is that.

Even better when my boyfriend knows how to cook it. Sexy and yummy.

Major Decision

2011-05-05T00:56:00.002-07:00

No tears. No doors slammed angrily in my face. Nobody swearing. My parents took it better than I thought ...

"I hate nursing ... I want to be an accountant."

Seriously?!

2011-04-19T21:05:00.001-07:00

Seriously?! Seriously ... C'mon now!! 7-2?!?!?! You guys are better than that! We should've swept Chicago right off the damn playoffs!! C'mon Canucks!! Don't choke!! Take 'em and rape 'em in Game 5!! DO IT!!!!!!!

Falling In Love

2011-04-18T13:28:00.002-07:00

"Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over." -edawe15

The more I read this quote, the more I fall in love with my boyfriend and the more I feel like I have lost myself in something so good even though I have no control (and I hate not having control).

Meme

2011-04-18T13:04:00.003-07:00

Just one of those online meme-thingies because I'm bored as hell.

*Bold any that applies to you*

01. You’re currently confused about someone’s feelings for you.
02. You have been in a serious relationship before. *In one right now*
03. You own an iPod of some sort.
04. You do not like your sibling’s girlfriend/boyfriend.
05. You drink too much alcohol.
06. You have been to the Olive Garden.
07. You have taken medicine of some sort this week.
08. It is really cold in your house right now.
09. You are extremely dependent on others.
10. You do not like to express your feelings in front of others.
11. You ate a lot of food today.
12. It doesn’t take much for you to cry.
13. People consider you as a happy sort of person.
14. Someone in your family is rich.
15. You have been to Disney World or Disneyland before.
16. You hate when people constantly talk about themselves.
17. You are a good listener, but you hate complainers.
18. Someone has called you for a serious medical emergency before.
19. You have had a serious surgery.
20. Your house has a spare bedroom.
21. Your house is old.
22. You have at least one cousin under the age of three.
23. You have never held a baby before.
24. You can’t handle toddlers.
25. You have a painting in your room.
26. You have been to Canada. I live in Canada lol
27. You have been to Mexico.
28. You love cherry flavored lollipops.
29. You celebrate Easter.
30. You observe Lent.
31. You are Catholic.
32. You do not believe in God.
33. Religion is not important to you.
34. You want to have a small family one day.
35. You would rather have more sons than daughters.
36. You have more aunts than uncles.
37. You hate being too cold.
38. You currently are way tanner than everyone else.
39. You wear shoes in your house.
40. Your parents are clean freaks.
41. You are more messy than clean.
42. You are currently angry at someone.
43. Patience is so not a virtue to you.
44. Your desk is extremely clean.
45. Your bed sheets are either blue, green, black, or white.
46. When you hear “black & white” it reminds you of Katy Perry’s ‘Hot n Cold’ song.
47. You have no clue what that song is.
48. You think rap artists are completely pathetic.
49. You are glad George Bush is out of office.
50. Politics are boring to you. (They’re quite fun actually. BAD POLITICIANS WHO ONLY THINK OF THEMSELVES ARE BORING.)
51. You take a vitamin daily.
52. You feel like you are sick often.
53. You hate throwing up.
54. You think it’s gross when people set food down on their desk at school with no napkin.
55. You also find it gross that people sit on top of desks.
56. You are now cringing at the thought of someone’s food where someone’s ass was.
57. You love getting bubble baths.
58. You do not like chocolate at all.
59. You are allergic to nuts.
60. You have been stung by a bee before.
61. You have been to the emergency room before for something.
62. One of your parents is 50 or older.
63. You are the baby of your immediate family.
64. You hate broccoli.
65. Cooked carrots are good, though.
66. You go on tumblr too much.
67. You are really comfortable right now.
68. You like witty t-shirts.
69. You are a major fan of underground bands.
70. You have been on an airplane before.
71. You are not afraid of heights.
72. You consider yourself paranoid.
73. You have had a panic attack before.
74. The thought of being old and alone bothers you.
75. You would choose the elderly over children.
76. You feel like you’re living in the wrong decade.
77. You like the color green.
78. You think it’s way too cold outside right now.
79. You love the thought of sleeping in tomorrow morning.
80. You would rather go to bed early and get up early.
81. You feel like the early bird catches the worm.
82. You are a big breakfast eater.
83. You are currently suffering from the common cold.
84. You are craving something salty.
85. You have been in a car today.
86. There is something plugged in near you.
87. You have heard of the TV show “Private Practice.”
88. You do not like medical television shows.
89. You prefer horror to comedies.
90. You adore Leo & Kate.
91. You think high-waisted pants look good.
92. You hate cheesy movies.
93. You enjoy camping out.
94. Bugs bother you.
95. You do well in school without trying.
96. You are extremely jealous of someone currently.
97. You feel like you have changed a lot from 08-09.
98. You like energy drinks.
99. You like italics.
100. You know the entire script of Mean Girls.

TFL: bubble tea

2011-04-15T00:10:00.001-07:00

Yup ... a bubble tea fanlisting. I'm surprised there isn't one yet. Submitted application form. Apparently I have to wait a month ... damn ... I was hoping like a week or something.

Fanlisting

2011-04-14T23:50:00.002-07:00

Now that I have some time on my hands because I am fucking free of school exams (YAY!) ... I am starting to get into this whole web thing. Now I want to start a fanlisting ... on what though? Everything I LOVE is already taken ... hmmm

Kitty Craving

2011-04-13T23:19:00.002-07:00

Never thought I would say this but I want a cat. I used to hate cats but now ... I'm starting to think I might actually be more of a cat person. They are cute and I guess the biggest selling point is that they are easier to take care of. Yup ... I can see myself with a cat ... weird.

Game 1

2011-04-13T21:12:00.003-07:00

Screw studying tonight. Game 1 of Vancouver Canucks vs. Chicago Blackhawks playoffs!!! Like fucking hell I'm studying. I'm praying we keep a shut-out for game 1.

GO CANUCKS!!!

Tired & Hungry

2011-04-13T14:12:00.002-07:00

*Look at title* What else is new?

Messed

2011-04-12T22:57:00.002-07:00

This sucks. I think my domain got hacked or something because everything is messed up. I finally had my site perfect and left it alone for a few days and it's all fucked up once I checked it out today. What is going on??

Term Paper Karma

2011-04-12T01:31:00.002-07:00

The chances of me writing a decent term paper in a few hours considering it is 1:30AM is very slim. Yet, here I am ... awake ... without a single word on my Microsoft Word, thinking I will be able to hand something in by 9:00AM.

There's the hand of procrastination slapping me in the face with a 2500-word demand.

I'm fucked.

Random

2011-04-11T22:00:00.003-07:00

You know what? I think I might just make this site about random thoughts that come in a sparatic manner in my head. I have never really had a place for that. It will be like a place for me to make all my random notes and thoughts; like a place for me to come to and collect the pieces together if you will ... if that makes any sense. It's like a weird sense of "statuses" (if you are a facebook or twitter user) I guess.

It's because I just can't let this site go. If you still looking for my blog and other things that I do normally then you can just go to my MAIN SITE.

DOMAIN

2011-04-08T03:14:00.003-07:00

As some of you might know. I actually have a domain of my own. To be honest, I have been maintaining that and this blogspot at the same time because I don't want to get rid of this blogger completely.

Blogspot has been good to me over the years. A lot of my basis and skill had derived from constantly playing around with blogspot. My growing skills in coding, graphics and design had all developed while I was using blogger and I will always be eternally grateful.

That's why I can't let go of it now. I still don't really know what I would use this blogger for. I'm sure I do want to use it for something since I'm a big blogger freak and have a million sites already. It's just that I finally learned how to use wordpress on my domain and OMG ... has it ever made my life so much easier and more convenient using WP. It was a bitch to get it started, let me tell you, but I have to say once you get the hang of it ... it's pretty damn cool. Anyways, I'll think of something to do with wickedful@blogspot. I always do. For now I can just keep posting my 30-Day-Challenges here, even though I also post them on my domain as well but that's my only option until I figure something out.

Any ideas?

Day 4 - Habit I Wish I Didn't Have

2011-04-05T20:59:00.002-07:00

day 4 - a habit that you wish you didn’t have

This is an easy one for me; it's no contest.

Smoking.

Yes ... sadly I am a smoker. I am so young with a terrible bad habit that slowly kills me one stick at a time. To be honest though, I don't smoke as heavily as I used to when I was a little younger. Given the time or place or how heavily stressed I am, only those factors determine how much I will smoke in a day.

I do not smoke at home out of respect for my family. Yes, they do know I smoke and they are not too happy about it but what can they do? Anyways, I choose not to smoke at home just because I don't want to expose my little brother to it and I just do not want my parents to see me smoke a cigarette. I just feel weird about it. I admit though when no one is home, I will go out into our backyard and quickly have one but that is pretty much it.

I only smoke when I'm out with friends or with my boyfriend since he smokes as well. I also smoke when I am incredibly stressed out; I smoke very heavily. Something about having a cigarette really relaxes me. It's more of a psychological association thing really. I know that. I know that if I transfer that mode of relaxtion to something else, like a cup of tea, I could probably transfer my addiction to cigarettes onto something else less harmful to my body. Of course, it's not as easy as it looks.

I have tried to quit numerous times but I have never been perfectly successful. The longest I have ever quit was for four months but with a strange turn of events that I THOUGHT was a stress point in my life turned me back to smoking. My boyfriend and I have also tried to quit together but the stress of not having one and the horrible mood swings we both endure and take out on each other pretty much led us to quit quitting smoking. We must have "broken up" like 5 times in the times we have tried to quit smoking hahaha. We just get on each other's throats and it's not a good time. We do have a desire to quit someday. We just have to find a good time where we genuinely want to quit (which is really the first step to quitting) and stick with it. The first few weeks are always tough but I'm sure we would eventually get used to it. But for now ... we are still smokers and we know it's a horrible thing (and expensive thing) to keep doing.

I started smoking in highschool and don't ask me why. I still do not know why I started. I guess I was really stressed out in highschool about a lot of things and I was curious as to why people turned to cigarettes as a release. Little did I know that I would be hooked. I was one of those people that thought it wouldn't be so hard to stop. Naive. Even though I was just smoking menthols, I thought that I wouldn't get hooked because menthols seemed like a light brand that every social smoker would just smoke and never get hooked. I was wrong. Menthols ARE STILL cigarettes and still have nicotine and no matter what you say ... you will still get hooked whether it be you just have one a day to a "just a few" a day. Trust me. Menthols are just a lighter mintier taste and easier on your breathing but it's still a cigarette.

Just don't start smoking guys. It's a horrible habit. I wish I never started smoking but what can I do now? I need to find that will power to stop and it's not easy but one day at a time. One day at a time.

Day 3 Favourite Photo

2011-03-28T17:37:00.002-07:00

Day 3 - A favourite photo that you have taken yourself and explain why

This is a photo that I took when I was about 17 or 18 years old. I was on a family trip in the summer of 2003 in Kelowna, BC. This was during a time when I did not even have a regular point-and-shoot digital camera, so I bought myself 2 disposable cameras for the trip to take some memories along the way.

I took this on the very last day of our stay in Kelowna at the nearby dock by our cabins. The scenery was just absolutely beautiful and peaceful and I just had to take a picture. What I didn't know was how beautiful the picture would turn out by just a simple disposable camera. Ever since I got this picture developed, I fell in love with it and right away, I framed it and it hangs on my wall in my room.

This picture is what started it all; my love for photography and capturing the beauty of the world around me with a simple action of a finger. When my boyfriend and I started to get ourselves into the world of photography, I looked at this specific photo in my room and told myself, "wow ... look at the potential I could have for taking the most beautiful moments of my life". It was this very photo that made me realize how precious photography was and it was this very photo that started my love for taking photos. It didn't even matter to me if it was a point-and-shoot
camera or a crazy DSLR or even a phone camera ... just taking a photo of a specific moment that would last forever in my mind (or on my wall) is just an incredible thing to me.

That's why I LOVE this photo and is one of my absolute favourites (if not, my ultimate favourite). Even though this wasn't taken by my Nikon DSLR, it still came out beautiful and it proves that it's not the camera that you use but the person who takes the picture.

I really do miss my D70 though ...

Day 2 - My Significant Other

2011-03-21T15:59:00.003-07:00

DAY 2 - How did you and your significant other get together? If you don't have one, describe what your dream boyfriend/girlfriend would be like.

Hmmm ... I don't know how long of a story this will be. I guess the best way to really tell this story is to start from the beginning so you can see the significance of us getting together. Here it goes ...

It all started at my college sometime in the fall. I think it was close to about 8 or 9 at night because I was about to head home but without having my one last smoke of the night first. So there I was outside in the "smoking pit", smoking my cigarette and minding my own business. Then I noticed HIM walking by inside the school and it struck me that I knew this guy because I went to highschool with him. He looked very different from what I remembered him to look like and that's what struck me the most but at the same time it was no really no big deal at that moment. I see familiar faces all the time from highschool, that's what happens. I'm sure people who have seen me from highschol recognize me but that's all there is to it.

Then ... there he goes walking by AGAIN. This time, he stopped and peered through the glass and actually looked at me. I stared a little bit because I was a little confused. Was he actually staring at me or was I just in the way of his vision towards something else? So I turned around and continued on with my smoke. I heard the doors open and felt a tap on my shoulder. There he was standing right in front of me with a little shy smile on his face and asked, "could I possible get a smoke from you?" Oh ... so he was looking at me ... for a smoke. I handed him one and even a lighter. I thought he was going to walk away as soon as he lit it because most people do and just leave with a, "thanks". He stuck around and leaned against the wall and looked at me.

"You look familiar .... Do I know you?" He asked me.
"No. But I know you," I said back. He looked really confused.
"OH? How?"
"Richmond High," I said with a little laugh and he started laughing, "I'm sure I just look familiar because you might have seen me in the hallways or something back in highschool."
"Yeah ... I think I do remember," he said. From that point, we made our official introductions and very quickly got comfortable with each other. We reminisced about our highschool days and laughed quite a bit about the things he used to do. The entire time, I continued to stare at him and it really started to dawn on me how different this guy was. It was like night and day. The way he spoke, the way he walked, the way he dressed ... quite the opposite of what I remembered this boy to look like back in highschool. I didn't know what to make of it at this point. He was a good-looking guy with the black turtleneck, black slacks and puma shoulder bag with the cute hair ... , I couldn't deny it but all it was at that point was a nice, friendly guy keeping up a fun conversation with me. It surprised me because I'm normally not that friendly towards strangers ... at least to that extent of having a full blown conversation about everything and anything.

I think a couple of hours have already gone by because I noticed that I was only down to 2 cigarettes left when I started off with practically a full pack. My cheeks were sore due to the laughter we were sharing and my hands were numb because it was chilly outside. We were talking deeply about our love for music and our favourite artist at the time: John Mayer. Because of this one singer, we actually talked about personal things and I had never felt so comfortable. I finally had to end the conversation though and to be honest, I really didn't want to but it was getting late and I had to get home. We said our goodbyes and that was it.

That night started a chain of "smoking pit meetings" almost every night. It came to a point where I would want to have a smoke, hoping he was down there for me to run into. He always was and he would always say "hi" and welcome me and we would talk for hours and hours and I always made sure I brought my entire pack of cigarettes. There would be times where I would be half an hour late for my classes because I kept losing track of time. He was a new friend. It was so easy, so comfortable, I was myself and I enjoyed every minute with him.

Eventually we became good enough friends that we hung out a couple of times after classes to play some pool or grab a bite to eat together. We even talked on MSN all the time, laughing our asses off at our nonsensical conversations and eventually we talked on the phone a few times too.

We did lose touch after a while. We didn't talk to each other for a good few months because from what I rememember, his cousin from Australia was staying with him and his family for a year and of course, he had to accomodate him. Also I later found out that he was actually seeing someone for a little bit. I didn't care at this point. He was still just a friend that I enjoyed talking to. I did miss him but I just tried to do my own thing.

Out of nowhere ... sometime in May ... he calls me up. I didn't know who it was and and when he revealed himself, I was ecstatic. A little more ecstatic than I thought I would have been. I ignored it the feeling. Our friendship had started again and the continuous phonecalls and MSN all-nighters continued. I was denying my feelings at this point because I was always the type to be very cautious when it came to new people ... especially guys. Plus ... he was such a great friend at this point that I didn't allow myself to at all ruin it ONE BIT. I couldn't. The friendship was near perfect that I couldn't dare wreck it. There was a bit of tension though I would have to say. If your read our old MSN conversations, you could read and feel the tension between us. It was very cute, very cheesy, very humorous. I don't know how to explain it. We just never flat out said, "hey ... let's officially go out for dinner".

By June, I decided to invite him and his cousin to my birthday party at my house. It took A LOT of deliberation regarding this decision. I wanted to then I didn't want to. I made a lot of coin tosses, plucked a lot of flowers, made a lot of eenie minie moes ... and it all came to "INVITE HIM". And let me tell you ... I AM SO GLAD I DID.

He was the first to arrive and I was really really really trying to contain myself. I was really happy that he was able to make it. His birthday gift to me? His ONLY COPY of John Mayer's Concert DVD - "Any Given Thursday" which was really really hard to find at that time. I thought that was the most endearing thing anyone has ever given me. I didn't think he payed attention to that when I said I was missing that in my John Mayer collection. Also ... he brought his guitar and I thought he was going to play for me and my friends. NO ... "I'm playing for YOU ... later". So it was a fun day. Him and I were getting really close and joking a lot around each other. I was really enjoying myself because it had been a long time since him and I had actually spent any physical time together since it was always just MSN and phone calls. I was really surprised to see how comfortable we were with each other. We had a BLAST during the bowling portion of my birthday. He demanded that I be on his team and we were just inseparable for the day. I wasn't really paying too much attention to anyone else and I kinda felt bad about that. I tried to make my rounds to everybody but it was hard.

For the night portion of my birthday ... I had decided to go clubbing. I really didn't want to at the end of the night but I couldn't think of anything else. He said that he probably wouldn't make it to that because he's not into that thing. I was a little disappointed and he saw it so he assured me that he will see what he can do and he will try ... At least he tried.

He DID end up coming for the sake that it would be good for his cousin to experience the clubbing scene since and meet some more new people because his cousin has never done those kinds of things back in Australia. Regardless, I was happy that he was there but I WAS AN IDIOT. I was really really really drunk when he walked in. I was taking shots and drinking A LOT. I started to feel really bad at this point and thought that I had blown it. "I must look like a total drunken idiot," I told myself. Here he was, obviously taking the chance to come even though he hates clubs and there I WAS ... drunk out of my mind. So I had thought I had blown it and tried to make the best out of it. I asked him to dance anyway and figured why not ... at least make most out of the night. At the end of clubbing, everyone rallied upstairs and I could barely walk. I tried to sit next to him and I ended up on the floor in front of him. He helped out though and made sure I was doing okay. I just kept wanting to hand my head in shame. It was at this point that I realized that clubbing really does suck and is completely pointless. Anyways, it was HIM to decided to leave the club and get me sobered up and get me some coffee. Everyone agreed and we all went to Denny's since it was 24-hours.

He helped me walk the entire way to Denny's from the car and made sure I was standing and made sure my arm didn't leave his. I couldn't understand why he was doing this but at this point I just didn't want to fall on my ass. Once we all got inside and was seated, he was pretty adament to order me some coffee and even convinced the waitress to let me have my free birthday coffee even though the day was a couple of days late to my actualy birthdate. He even asked how I wanted my coffee and stirred for me. I was still very dizzy at this point and my head just would not lift off his shoulder because I was scared that I would throw up. But everyone else was a having a great time telling stories, laughing, recapping our day ... even he was making everyone laugh with charismatic stories.

I was finally half-sober. I was more aware of things but I still felt like shit. Then I noticed him slowly caressing my hand as if he was comforting me in some way underneath the table. I was really confused because I didn't know what it meant. Was he just being nice because I was feeling like crap or did it mean I thought it meant? I let him continue. I wanted to see where it went. Then ... he actually grabbed my hand and held it the whole time. That was an instant SOBER call. I opened my eyes as widely as they could go and my dizziness instantly went away. WHY IS HE HOLDING MY HAND? WHY IS HE RUBBING MY ARM? DID HE JUST KISS MY FOREHEAD? I wanted to start giggling but I stopped myself. I returned the affection discretely although I already noticed one of my friends trying to be nosy and figure out what we were doing underneath the table. I thought that this was a temporary thing because he let go to use his hands to demonstrate something and I thought that was it. He let go ... but NOPE ... he went straight back to holding my hand and massaged my fingers and my arm and it honestly felt like this was a normal thing for us.

When it was time for all of us to go home ... I got scared and I kept my distance. I was really really confused and I didn't know what to do. I had never gone through something like this before and I didn't know what it all meant. My friends said it was pretty obvious that he liked but I didn't know what to do with it. I just kept saying to myself, "well if he does ... he'll come back and ask me out ... IF he does ..."

I couldn't stop thinking about him and the night at Denny's from the moment I got home to the next day. I was anxiously waiting on my computer waiting for him to get on MSN and finally he messaged me. He ended up talking about what happened and he was actually just anxious about the whole thing. He was actually apologizing if he freaked me out in any way bout the hand-holidng thing. HAHA. He was just so happy that he made it out for my birthday and that he spent time with me and that we got to interact more with each other and pretty much revealved that he would like to be with me. I told him that I'm not that easy to be with but he said, "if you are willing to give me a chance ... I am willing to try".

That was that start of it and the rest was history ... It's been almost 5 YEARS now and we are still going strong. We always joke about that night of my birthday and it's great to have my birthday be such a significant memory for the both of us. So not only did I become officially an adult that night by turning 21, but I also got myself a wonderful boyfriend. That's why he always makes sure that I get an awesome birthday every year because it just means so much to us.

I don't know if you guys managed to read all of that because I don't know if you really care but that is our story of us and how we got together! <3<3<3

Day 1 - 30 Day Challenge

2011-03-10T22:57:00.004-08:00

Day 1 - A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

1. My full name is Sharleene but I prefer to be called "Shar" because everytime I hear my full name, I think I am in trouble of some sort.

2. I am taken and practically married. I have been with my wonderful significant other for almost 5 years now and yes ... I have come to a point where I would not know what to do without him in life. He's my best friend, my lover, my family and my everything.

3. I am fanatically obsessed with Hello Kitty. I have this strange goal to own every type of paraphanelia ever possible that has to do with Hello Kitty. Obsessed.

4. I consider myself pretty artsy I guess. I LOVE all aspects of art whether it be music, artwork, dance, photography, sculptures, etc. I love to draw traditionally and digitally (my favourite thing to do is play with my Photoshop), and I love anything to do with arts & crafts since I also knit and crochet.

5. I CANNOT stand being bored. Really I can't. It's a rare thing for me to just want to stay home and do nothing. I always have to be doing something.

6. I am full-on Filipino but I was born in the Middle East (Bahrain to be exact) but I currently am a Canadian Citizen, living in Vancouver, BC.

7. I actually understand some French but I am very choppy in speaking the language. I have been learning French since the first grade in Bahrain but my learning slowed down once I got to Canada because they are a bit slower in curriculum here and I pretty much learned everything I already knew when I got here so I never really got anywhere to far with it. I think I can hold a decent conversation though.

8. I have a little brother is who is 17 years younger than me. He does get mistakenly regarded as my "son" and sometimes I play along with it especially for the ignorant ones who give me dirty looks because they THINK/ASSUME I'm some dirty teenage mom.

9. I used to have a British accent when I was younger because I adapted to the speech of my environment living in Bahrain. In actuality, I sometimes still have it and I have to carefully suppress it when I speak because it just sounds very awkward to me and I do not like it one bit.

10. I may be short and look sweet but I do have a mean streak when I need to be. Just ask any of my old managers in my old jobs HAHA. My favourite quote from one of my old co-workers was, "Always watch out for the little sweet Asian ones. They'll fucking come and get you like a fucking cat!!"

11. I consider myself to be very bold and adventurous when it comes to style. I will wear any color, any style (as long as the items actually fit me) and same goes with hair. I am used to changing my hairstyle 6 times a year. I've gone really really short to super super long to whatever other mess in between.

12. Considering I am a very short girl, I rarely ever wear heels. It's not that I don't like them (because I think heels are actually very sexy and looks great with my legs), it's just my feet just can't take them! Time and time again, I've tried wearing heels and within ten minutes, I want to start crying because I am in soooo much pain and feel like my feet are going to fall off.

13. I am incredibly sentimental. I will remember the sweetest moments of my life and will always TRY to keep as many keepsakes as a I can. I already have 2 boxes full of random sentimental things from my boyfriend. I guess that is why I love photos so much.

14. I am a caffeine whore. I am THAT addicted to coffee that when I don't have my cup of coffee by 2 in the afternoon, I will start to get migraines. It will only take one sip for the feeling of euphoria and relief to set in. I also that immune to it however ... I can have a cup of coffee late at night and pretty much go to bed in the next minute.

15. I am an anime lover. I always have to watch some type of anime before I go to bed. Right now my love is Bleach. I get really attached to the characters and the storyline, especially there is a lot of action and a lot of romance. In addition, I also have a dark side because I also LOVE those dark, creepy themed animes too.

30 Day Challenge

2011-03-10T22:20:00.003-08:00

Like I said in my previous entry, I have decided to start a 30-day Challenge. I think it's a good way to get my brain going and a good way to keep myself writing since I express myself better in writing than in speaking anyway.

Here's my list:

day 1 - recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
day 2 - How did you and your significant other get together? If you don't have one, describe what your dream boyfriend/girlfriend would be like.
day 3 - A favourite photo that you have taken yourself and explain why
day 4 - a habit that you wish you didn’t have
day 5 - a picture of somewhere you've been
day 6 - favorite super hero and why
day 7 - Talk about a tattoo that you have and the story behind it. If you do not have one, maybe show a picture of a tattoo you would like to have and explain why you want it.
day 8 - Write about a memory that you think is quite creepy or scary.
day 9 - something you're proud of in the past few days
day 10 - songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
day 11 - write a bucket list of things you want to do before you die
day 12 - write a poem to someone you love
day 13 - What are your biggest fears?
day 14 - a picture of you and your family
day 15 - put your ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play
day 16 - What is your definition of true love?
day 17 - plans/dreams/goals you have
day 18 - write about a sweet memory from your past
day 19 - write a letter to someone
day 20 - a picture of something that makes you happy
day 21- Who is your best friend in life?
day 22- Talk about your guilty pleasures.
day 23- post your favorite quote or verse of scripture and why
day 24- what I would find in your bag
day 25- What does your name mean? Why were you named what you were named?
day 26 - The most romantic moment of your life so far. If you don't have one yet, what would you imagine to be the most romantic moment you would love to encounter.
day 27- Put up a recipe
day 28- Your favourite movie
day 29 - What do people notice about you?
day 30 - Your favourite tv shows and why.

Alive!

2011-03-10T01:16:00.002-08:00

I have decided to keep this blog alive. Why? I'm not too sure. Maybe because I just have that love for blogging. Maybe I need to do something else other than school. Maybe ... maybe ... I just felt like it. Who knows. I have just been very busy with life: school, family, romance, etc etc. I felt bad for neglecting the online part of me though so I decided to keep myself going.

I, at least, started continuing my photo blog again since I actually use my Ipod Touch quite a bit for photos. I mostly take photos of my dog but hey ... a picture is a picture I say.

A new friend I have made actually has a blog too and I noticed that she, too, has started doing a 30-day blog challenge like many others out there. I have been wanting to a challege for a while too but of course, silly me, thought I had the time to do it. But now ... I decided that I will MAKE TIME for my online world so I have been inspired to start such a challenge. I just have to pick a good batch since each one I have been seeing are so different from each other. Well ... I guess the easiest thing to do is just mix and match LOL. We will see what I can come up with. Maybe starting tomorrow ...

Sicky

2010-12-20T16:57:00.002-08:00

I am not feeling good at all. I am a bit dizzy, feeling a little hot and groggy. I am scared I am getting sick then again it would be my fault because I should have just brought my jacket every time we went out for a smoke. It just sucks that we had to constantly sneak out to have one since apparently we are not allowed to smoke around the venue which I thought was stupid. So it was very cold night with a little sprinkle of rain so that really did me in.

I've already drank my nyquill here at 4:30pm so that I can drift off into la-la land early and hopefully get a good long rest.

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I applied to a couple of hosting sites. For some reason it was a bit difficult for me to find some. I hope I get accepted to some soon because I would just love to get started on some of my site! Already trying to figure out what will go where and what I will be putting up. I'm quite excited. I am still figuring out though if I should do wordpress or fanupdate. I kinda already know how to install fanupdate so that might be a bit easier for me but I have NO idea how to use WORDPRESS. I don't know where to start, how to install it, how to customize it ... I have NO CLUE. If you guys have any good tutorials please let me know!!!

Puppy Parents

2010-12-20T10:53:00.002-08:00

Having a puppy is like having a real child. In some ways it's a harder. I know this because I have a younger brother who is 18 years younger than me and I had to take care of him a lot. Anyways, my boyfriend and I are like constantly worrywart parents. Going out to check on our baby puppy or passing by home every couple of hours just to see how he is doing. Little Enzo just had surgery on his ears and every little thing that we see on his ears we start to questions and we have already passed by the vet like 4 times in 2 weeks for walk-in checkups to see if the redness or swelling in his ears are normal. So far everything we have been freaking out about is actually normal HAHAHA. We just love our puppy, like the proud and caring "parents" that we are.

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Now that I have won a few credits for a domain, I might be moving this site onto there! Don't know when that is going to happen yet since I have to get myself re-aquainted with the layout process like the PHP and all that. That's going to be fun isn't it? I'm still deciding on when to actually order it and get it started. I still have to find a host too. I hope I can find someone to host me!! Anyways, I still have a lot of planning to do like what to put on my site, plan out my new layout, figure out the coding and etc. I think I will do all of that first before I even register for a domain. Hope my domain name is not taken.

Choices

2010-12-13T22:39:00.003-08:00

Look at what has been produced out of my procrastination? A new layout. I told myself I wasn't going to change it but I couldn't help it. I thought of an idea of how a certain layout should look like and I tried to do it. After an hour or so of frustration, I managed to get it. Don't worry. I did get some studying done. But now I am going to be up most of the night trying to get studying in.

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Making choices really do count in life don't they? A random thing to think about sometimes but after a conversation I had with a few of my friends and my boyfriend last night really made me think about it. We all make a variety of choices in our lives; some choices don't work, some are incredible and some are just "what the fuck did I do" kind of choices. Althought sometimes, those choices make us realize things for the better and eventually things work out in the end. So I guess sometimes the choices we make can be a huge risk to our lives and we won't know if they are actually worth it until the time comes.

I have a dear friend that I love very much and means a lot of me. A friend that I am proud to call my friend because she is one of the sweetest and most caring and generous people I have ever encountered in this lifetime. Sad to say that some of the choices she has made had not been good ones but they somewhat turned out for the better down the road. Lately, however, I feel like she had been making some "off" choices and is kinda struggling. I am not bashing or wanting to tell her what to do but I really do hope that the choices she has made will be one of those choices that turn out really good for her in the end.

It's just hard to get out of certain situations. The people around you really make a difference sometimes. Sometimes the person doesn't really notice the bad influences around him/her. Sometimes, the people around you is the only form of stability they have and they stick with it, not noticing that certain person or people is not really helping the situation. You can feel stuck ... stuck playing a role that you are so damn accustomed to that you feel it's too late to get out of. Or you could just not notice you are stuck because you have nothing else to turn to. It's these situations that are conflicting. Of course, with a little mind power, WILL power and that first kick in the ass can help you get that foot in the door and do better for yourself.

Sometimes, you just have to admit that you need help and know that there ARE people out there who are willing you help you with anything you need ... help you make the right choices.

Hell ... I've made bad choices before but I eventually came to my senses and realized that I can do better. I made better choices, actually pursued them and I am a better person for it and very thankful for all that I have and for the amazing people around me.

So be careful about the choices you make in life. You only get one life, so do the best you can to make it the best one.

I Heart Blackberry

2010-12-10T02:41:00.003-08:00

I love that Walmart is 24hrs for the whole month of December. It's so strange walking in at Walmart at about Midnight and leaving at about 2am. Wasn't too successful with shopping for more Christmas gifts though. We are only just scratching the surface. At least we still have some time to look for more presents.

Thank goodness for phones that are Twitter-enabled. I have been trying to keep on track with the Namecheap Trivia contest (since they post a trivia question every single hour) and I would not be able to keep up if I didn't have my Blackberry. So far I have won one domain and I am quite excited about it because it's free for a year!! I am trying to win more though. I don't know what I would really do with so many domains but I know for sure that I am saving one for my dear friend and her brother because they have an amazing idea for a website. I hope to be able to get one for them.

I am planning on changing the layout to this blog soon since I have finally learned how to somewhat handle the XML so that I can have widgets. Then again ... since I am going to have a domain soon ... I might just concentrate on a brand new layout for it. I am probably going to try to go for a "wickedful.net" domain this time since my last one was "wickedful.info". We will see how it all goes.

Nothing significant and thought-provoking today -_-"

UPDATES:
-New photo at my Photo Journal
-Ranted yesterday at my Rant Blog
-Posted a new XML blogger skin at my Art Blog

An Old Lady's IGNORANCE

2010-12-08T16:57:00.000-08:00

Ignorance angers me. It really does. This morning's situtation is a perfect example. Still boils my blood just thinking about it.

My boyfriend and I have a little puppy named Enzo. A cute and sweet little 8-week-old, blue coloured pitbull. My boyfriend has decided to crop his ears because he loves the look and we think he will still look as cute despite the stigma the cropping ears have. It's something he has always wanted to do but we were still on the fence about it.

So we went to the vet anyway because we had the appointment. The kind receptionist handed us a binder regarding all the information we needed to know about the whole process: after care, the implications, kinds of cropping and what breeds get it done. After reading a few pages, we were even more on the fence because we didn't realize the amount of work needed for the after-care. My boyfriend was torn. He wanted to do it but his main concern was for Enzo. He did not know if he wanted to put Enzo through such an ordeal but of course he still had faith that we were going to be on top of the after-care because we love him so much. The receptionist even said that we can take as much time as we want to talk about it and there will be no hard feelings if we do not go through with it because they understand how the situation can be. She was a very very nice lady.

In the midst of all the deciding we had to do, this old lady with curly white hair and a poodle was sitting a few chairs from us and asked us what kind of puppy we had. We said "pitbull". You could see the fear in her face. She right away said that she was scared of them because she has these neighbours(who apparently were into drugs and whatnot) with vicious pitbulls who already have chased her down the street. She further then admitted that she doesn't like all big breeds like rottweilers, dobbermans and etc. She also added that we should not even think about cropping little Enzo's ears. Why? I don't know but it was probably because she had notions that he would look scary and already assuming that he has a bad personality. That didn't sway us of course. The loss of aesthetics didn't bother us. It was his well-being that we were worried about.

We decided to make another appointment instead so that we have more time to think about it. As we were about to step into the car, my boyfriend and I talked it over again and we just decided to go ahead with it. We knew the responsibilities we were going to have with the aftercare and there is nothing wrong with wanting your dog to look a certain way. So we went back inside.

As my boyfriend was talking to the receptionist, the old lady came out of her appointment and was surprised to see us still there. She asked if were going through with it and we grinned. She said that if it was her, she wouldn't do it. *Good for you old lady* As she was stepping out the door, she faces me and says,

"I hope your dog bites you one day for doing this".

Jaws dropped. Everyone's jaws dropped. Did I just get threatened by an old lady? My boyfriend said, "That is not a nice thing to say!". The old lady didn't care and walked away. Everyone didn't know what to say. It was shock. Me included. I was speechless. The receptionist was pretty upset by it as well. My boyfriend later told me that as soon as the old lady said what she said, the receptionist called out, "BITCH". The receptionist and everyone else defended us and said that these kinds of people are around all the time and it's very sad to hear it since they work there. Everyone else that was there were also Pitbull lovers so it was even more of a big offense to them.

Can you believe that? An old lady just wished for MY dog to ATTACK ME! Her little poodle wasn't even that friendly either! It was barking and growling at every dog that went by!

I understand that she was traumatized by her own experiences of bad dogs. I understand that people have their own opinions but keep them to yourself!! AND DO NOT WISH HARM ON OTHER PEOPLE!!! She was the face of ignorance. Who does she think she is? She does not know me and my boyfriend. She does not know Enzo and our other dog. It's kinda funny because all the dogs she was listing that she was scared of, my boyfriend and I have had some point in time HAHAHA. My boyfriend has had a rottweiler, has a German Shephard and now has 2 pitbulls. Not to mention he also has a little Cockapoo too!!!! HAHAHA. Let's invite that old lady to dinner!!!! I would LOVE to invite her into that house with all those dogs!

So that was an experience. Being threatened by an old lady with white curly hair and her little yappy/vicious poodle. I will be the bigger woman in this situation.

To the old lady,

I do not and will never wish harm upon you. I wish for you be home safely and never get attacked by dogs. Karma, on the other hand, may not be so kind. Try explaning your ignorance to the face of karma.
=)

Boot or Motivation?

2010-12-06T16:02:00.004-08:00

My boyfriend, his friend and I were having a big conversation about this whole LeBron James vs. Michael Jordan. Our friend is a huge LeBron fan and my boyfriend told him to check out his commercial about how LeBron is getting a little defensive about deciding to move on to the Miami Heat. At the same time, my bf also wanted him to check out ANOTHER commercial that Michael Jordan made as a response to LeBron's commercial.

We watched both and I was a little surprised to Michael Jordan's response. Not in a bad way. I actually really really liked it. The question in the air, of course, was ... was Jordan bashing LeBron or was it a motivational push?

Here's LeBron's commercial.

Now HERE is MICHAEL JORDAN'S RESPONSE to LEBRON

What is my opinion? Michael Jordan is not trying to bash him. He is trying to give LeBron a little kick in the ass to show him that he's straying a bit off the path to success. I mean, who are we kidding? We all know that LeBron is a bit about the flash. He has a bit of that arrogance and that need to show how good and rich he is. It really did not help him when he decided to leave his hometown of Cleveland (to some people he "abandoned" the Cavaliers) and move on to the Miami Heat. I remember how huge of a big deal all that was.

Michael Jordan was pretty much the opposite. My boyfriend reminded me of how Michael went through almost the same as LeBron back in the day. The Chicago Bulls was one of the worst teams. They were barely winning any games and they were barely making any money because seats were not filling up. Michael still never gave up. He was given a choice to leave and he was even questioned on whether he was really that good of a player and did he deserve all the praise he was getting. He never gave up. He stayed and wanted to LEAD his team to a championship. And guess what? Over 6 champions the Bulls won and Jordan was there until the end.

I think that's what Jordan was trying to tell LeBron. Basically he was telling him to suck it up and stop being a bitch. You want to be a star or a leader? I guess for LeBron it was one or the other. For Jordan, it was obviously possible to have both. I think Jordan was trying to tell LeBron that he knew he was a damn good player but be right about it. Stop bitching and getting defensive if people are questioning your skills, don't be so flash about your money, figure out your priorities - basketball or fame? Jordan always played for the game or else he would have moved on to another different team a long long long long long time ago to get a championship. He was proud that he was persistent, he was proud that he was a leader and he was proud of the how the team grew and became one of the most well-known basketball teams in the world.

That's why I LOVE this commercial of Michael Jordan responding to LeBron James. "Maybe ... You are just making excuses," he says just as calm as LeBron does in his own commercial. It was perfect.

This is one of my ultimate favourite quotes of all-time and it was from Michael Jordan,

"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
-Michael Jordan

I LOVE MICHAEL JORDAN.

Ribbed-Style Button Neck Warmer

2010-11-29T22:16:00.007-08:00

I have finally finished my neck warmer!! I love it! It really didn't take me long to do and I now plan on making more as Christmas gifts!! I just need to get myself more buttons.

Here's the pattern that I had designed for this specific neck warmer.

RIBBED STYLE BUTTON NECK WARMER/COWL

I used US 10 needles (6mm) and chunky yarn.
Up to you what yarn and what needles you want to use. I like chunky yarn because it's thick and warm and takes less time to make.

What else you need?
Buttons (3 or 6)
Yarn sewing needles

Abbreviations:
K - knit
P - purl
YO - yarn over
K2tog - knit 2 together
Ptbl - purl through back loop
Ktbl - knit through back loop

CO 24 St
1. ROW 1 *K4, P1tbl* all the way across ending in last 4 knits of row
2. Row 2 *P4, K1tbl* all the way across ending in last 4 purls of row
3. Row 3 Repeat line 1
4. Row 4 (eyelet buttonholes row) K3, (YO K2Tog), K6, (YO K2Tog), K6, (Yo K2Tog), K3 for 3 buttonholes in total.
5. Continue pattern (lines 1 and 2) all the way until desired length of neck warmer and bind off.
6. Line up your buttons with your buttonholes and sew them in.
7. Weave in any stray yarn and you are DONE! ENJOY!!
**Block if you find it necessary**

Knitting a neck warmer

2010-11-27T21:33:00.004-08:00

I have been working on my latest knitting project, a button neck warmer. It's coming along pretty well so far. I actually decided to write up a pattern for it too which I'm excited about because I have never written up a pattern before.

I'm really liking it and I am really tempted to keep it for myself when I'm done with it. I was thinking of making it as a Christmas gift but I guess we will see when it's done because I'm hoping that it will turn out okay. I actually still have to find some matching buttons for the finished product.

I had to do a lot of youtube searching for different types of knitting moves. I kinda wasted a lot of yarn just to figure them out because a lot of them really really confused me haha. I guess practice comes with time. There's still a lot of things I need to learn when it comes to knitting.

I will put up a picture of my neck warmer as soon as it's all finished along with the pattern that I made for it so that all you knitters can try it out if you like it!

Not Ready For Snow

2010-11-19T00:53:00.003-08:00

Snow ... belongs on the mountains and not in my backyard. I am not ready for snow. Really. I just took a ride with my boyfriend to Surrey to drop off his car for temporary storage and wow ... some cars were already getting covered in snow while large flakes were sticking to everything they landed on. I'M NOT READY!! I was in a bit of denial. I was not expecting snow to come so soon. I thought that the snow wasn't coming until at least January since our winters have come late in previous years. I really don't want it to snow yet. I can't drive in it. I have a fear of driving in it. Plus I'm a big klutz. I'm a walking injury waiting to happen.

I looked at myself in the mirror and realized that I have lost SOME weight!! But here I am eating a left over McDonalds cheeseburger at one in the morning. Yes ... that's real progress right there. But hey ... at least I know that mini-stepper really is doing me some good!

Oh ... and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABY!! We are almost at the 4-and-half-year point! Yay!

Mind-Numbing

2010-11-18T13:04:00.003-08:00

Going through one of those "life is shit" days is bittersweet yet very unexplainable at this moment. I don't know what to say. It could just be the crappy, cold weather affecting my mood or it could just be life's unexpected situations that put me feeling a little on the noncomplacent side. So for now ... life is just ... shit.

I am going to try to keep myself occupied for a number of hours doing something mind-numbingly useless. I am going to upgrade my lack-thereof webdesigning skills and try to vamp my blog(S) with this whole new XML thing. If I can figure it out. It's going to be one of those times where I drive myself up the wall figuring out the tiniest details. I will be pulling out my hair only to find out that it's simple as pressing a button and render myself an idiot (I am already laughing out loud imagining myself going through such a situation). At least this will keep me occupied. At least there will be some sort of satisfaction in the end if I find myself successful. At least this might lighten up my mood a little.

-------

I have started to exercise; slowly but surely. My mom bought this mini-stepper-thing and I have to say it's actually fun. It kills my legs and so bad for my knees and my back but I do have that feeling of satisfaction that I did some sort of mobility. I am even tracking how many calories I have burned with each session along with how long I "stepped" for and how many steps I have taken. So far it's improving everyday. That's one good thing so far. I hope to keep it up cause who are we kidding? It's me and exercise. It's one of those persistent love-hate relationships that you can't stay away from.

Crack-berry

2010-11-08T19:48:00.003-08:00

I had an Iphone.

Changed phones.

Now I have a blackberry bold.

Sold Iphone.

I <3 BBM.

New Wishlist ---> Latest IPOD TOUCH GEN4 ... Really really want one.

The List

2010-11-03T17:29:00.002-07:00

We all go through our days thinking about things of what we would like to do, love to do, wish we could do, dream we could do in our lifetime before our time comes to be in a better place (whatever that may be for each individual). I realize that I would like to list that out officially and wished I had done it earlier since I have already fulfilled some of those items off my "bucket list" if you will ...

So is this a to-do list or some kind of dream list? Hard to really tell because I don't know yet if any of these items are possible (since I haven't started typing them out yet ...) but it's fun to see what comes out of my mind anyway, no matter how ridiculous some of these may be.

1)I would love to sell at least of my self-created items (from a drawing to a knitted scarf to a photograph, etc) to give me a satisfaction that I am one foot in the door of becoming an entrepreneur.
2)I would love to finally finish at least one self-created item first.
3)I would like to put on a pair of pants comfortably.
4)I would like to know more Japanese than just the random words I hear in the anime shows and not know really what they mean.
5)I would actually like to touch a fish while it is still alive.
6)I would like to wear a pair of high heels with conviction.
7)I would like to not imagine myself in a wedding dress for at least one day.
8)I would love to bake anything with just a drop of a name.
9)I would really like to believe that I can still lift a 50lb popcorn seed bag.
10)I would like to believe that my weight can be lost with some miracle trend gimmick.

The Best Dog Ever!!

2010-11-02T23:13:00.003-07:00

Aiii yaaaa ... it's already November. It just hit me. It's strange how fast things went. It still feel like it was JUST my birthday, then my boyfriend's birthday; by the time you know it, it's Thanksgiving, then Halloween ... soon enough it's going to be Christmas! I LOVE CHRISTMAS. Time to start planning out the gifts and the budget.

A VERY OVERWHELMING SUCCESS with Taison, our pitbull puppy ... my boyfriend and I experimented this morning on leaving him alone, roaming the house rather than couping him up in his kennel. We were scared, obviously, because of all the horror stories of how these dogs will just chew on just about anything and everything. It also didn't help that Taison has a bit of separation anxiety so he chews and drools double the amount. Anyways, we decided to clear out all the possible hazards in the house and set up the webcam to record his activities while we were gone. We didn't go out for too long. We just wanted to step out for a coffee at Tim Horton's which is about 10 minutes away. When we came back ... NOTHING was wrong. Nothing was chewed up, no unwanted surprises in the form of urine and feces ... not even any drool. CRAZY! We reviewed the video and he was soo good!! He whined a little because he was missing us but most of the time he sat on the couch and waited for us to come back with a few whimpers here and there. We were gone for about 17 mins and no havoc was created! WE WERE IMPRESSED!!

Here was the ultimate test. I left my boyfriend's house early because I was getting tired but my boyfriend was still at work. It won't be for another two hours until he gets home. It was a risk we were willing to take because one way or another, we were going to test Taison being home alone for more than just 20 minutes. Luckily, I bought him a bully stick for him to chew on too. I was nervous. Really nervous.

My boyfriend just called me because he just got home and he said that the place is just amazingly the same. Nothing was ripped apart, no accidents, nothing. He looked at the video and the whole 2 and a half hours was just of Taison chewing on his bully stick and only got up to drink water from his bowl. AMAZING!! OMG!! WOW!! IMPRESSIVE!! And people say that pitbulls are difficult to deal with ... BULLSHIT! We must have the most special dog ever then. So I guess the secret is to just keep him busy. We are going to try it again tomorrow since my boyfriend is working late again. I hope that Taison really is this amazing to be able to leave at home free to roam!!

There's my baby boy!!

Hallooooweeen Liberation

2010-11-01T23:41:00.004-07:00

Halloween was pretty fun. I felt sexy in my little Batgirl outfit and was happy that I had an entourage. I had my Robin, a Superman, a Batman and even our villain, the Joker. It was great taking pictures and just enjoying ourselves dressed up in what could only be so liberating from ourselves for a day. It was a fun night. It ended with a fright too - watched "Paranormal Activities 2". The first one was scarier but this movie still did it's job. It was freaky. I jumped many many times as I grabbed my boyfriend and my good friend grabbed me LOL. It was a disturbing movie but that's what it's for!

There is some kind of freedom in writing isn't there? And I mean literally writing, not typing like on a blog here. There's something different in physically writing on a piece of paper your thoughts and just continuing that stream of conciousness until your hand hurts. I just had that pleasure a few moments ago as I wrote in a journal, not in a form of an entry but in a form of a letter. I realized that I might just do that from time to time - write secret letters that no one will ever see. It's different, and something about writing a letter that further streams my conciousness because I realized that I barely used any punctuation. It's liberating.

Hello Kitty

2010-10-29T00:48:00.006-07:00

So ... I have this little obsession with Hello Kitty. I think it's the only materialistic obsession that has lasted for quite a while now. I don't know what it is ... I just love Hello Kitty! I'm silently and not sure if secretly trying to create a collection of Hello Kitty things. Well ... I am on my way there. Let's see, I have a keychain cover, long body pillow, wallet, phone accessory, tshirts, bobblehead ... I think I have more I just cannot remember at the moment. Guaranteed, I will be blogging about random Hello Kitty things just because I am obsessed.

FOR INSTANCE! I found THESE!!!!!. Yes ... I am following a bunch of blogs of people that are also obsessed with Hello Kitty ... but they're the ones who actually have a blog SPECIFICALLY on JUST Hello Kitty related things! Anyways, these are awesome! I WANT A PAIR!!! How awesome are these??! Hee Hee!!

This is what I kinda want. Maybe an idea for Christmas ... We have a BUILD-A-BEAR here in Vancouver and they have HELLO KITTY!! I want to make a HELLO KITTY and dress her up. I don't know what she's going to be yet but I want my own little Hello Kitty!!

NOW THIS IS HILARIOUS!! HELLO KITTY RIMS!! I can't believe it!! Having date a tuner for almost 5 years ... I have never come across Hello Kitty Rims. This is too amazing. I am going to show this to my boyfriend. He's going to laugh at me because if I ever get my own tuner car, he's going to think that this is how I want to "girlie-up" my car. Yes ... I love Hello Kitty but c'mon now ... I WILL NOT get Hello Kitty Rims.

Wow .. This website here http://houseofkittyblog.com/ ... makes me all giddy just looking at all the Hello Kitty stuff she encountered from all around the world INCLUDING OUR VERY OWN ABERDEEN CENTER! How crazy is that?

On the topic of Hello Kitty. Halloween is only a few days away and my boyfriend and I have decided to do some pumpkin carving!! Guess what I'm going to attempt at carving? Hahahhaha ... HELLO KITTY DUH!!!

Good Ol' D70

2010-10-27T23:10:00.002-07:00

So I splurged with buying makeup over at a trip to Daiso haha. I love it though. I am determined to grow my collection of makeup. Now ... if only Sephora would open up in Richmond already!! I swear that mall has been in renovation for like years now.

Anyways, doing all this makeup practice is really making me miss my SLR camera. I miss it sooo much. Just imagine all the crazy photography I could have taken by now with my makeup designs ... It's one of my things on my "bucket list" to do some portrait, fashion photography. I have always wanted to take photos of people in a beautiful limelight. I have one volunteer, B. I just need to get myself a camera to get started. Well techinically I am halfway there with her because I have already experimented with her makeup so ... I just need to photograph it. GRRRR I WANT MY CAMERA!! That's all I pretty much want now ... is a new Nikon SLR camera. It doesn't have to be crazy. I mean all I had before was the D70 and that camera was so damn good to me. I took some amazing photos with that thing ... My goodness I miss photography.

Now going into a reminiscive state ...

SAKURA EYES

2010-10-27T11:27:00.003-07:00

Ok ... I did it. I MADE A MAKE-UP BLOG called SAKURA EYES: a makeup blog. I figure I love it so much, why not make one?!?! So visit if you are into that whole thing. I probably will be posting a lot on it.

I decided to skip class today because I am exhausted. It's probably because I was up all night playing with my make-up and that's because I couldn't sleep. I was having one of my insomniac moments. I could barely open my eyes this morning and I was a little suprised that I was able to walk down the stairs without tumbling all the way down. I feel like I'm running on auto-pilot right. I am typing, yes, but at the same time I feel like I not really controlling it. It's strange. I noticed it when I was not even paying attention to the radio in my car this morning and found myself singing along to a song without me really being aware of it. Ever done that? Or is it just me? Point? I need more sleep. So here I am at my boyfriend's house, hanging out and relaxing on the couch just playing around with my computer. My insomnia is kicking in again so I can't even take a nap. So jealous of my dog right now. He's snoring like crazy and won't even move when I poke him. That's some deep sleep I could use right now.

Moods

2010-10-26T23:28:00.006-07:00

MOODS

I am in a strange mood. It's one of those moods that makes my boyfriend look at me with a puzzled but amazed look on his face and always ends up saying, "you're so cute babe". Sometimes I don't know how to react to that because I can hear myself. I am in one of those moods where I am rambling and talking and talking about nonsense things and laughing about God-knows-what ... So what's so cute about it? I don't know but at least I know that he finds it attractive in some strange way. I guess I am lucky haha.

Maybe my mood is derived from the joy that my boyfriend has right now with the return of his beloved "Stark". The car looks absolutely gorgeous. The color, color scheme, the body kit ... gorgeous. One of those cars that you cannot take your eyes off of. I am quite happy for him. It's strange being sucked in to this culture of "tuner cars". I learned this from Bia as she wrote a paper on how this phenomenon truly is a culture. I agree 100%. I am sucked in as well now that I look in the direction of certain cars that pass by me on the street or out my window. I hear the distinct sounds of the engines and I can tell which cars are automatic and which are manual. I can tell what cars have which intention just by looking at them ... it's crazy to me but at the same time I am fascinated by it. It makes me want to be officially part of it by owning my own "tuner" car but of course ... it's not happening haha. I can't even drive a stick. Eventually.

So ... for my previous blog entry about the cookies I baked ... My boyfriend and his sister came up with the perfect description of what they are like. Because of this I have decided to come up with relative name for this little recipe of mine ... MUFFIN TOP COOKIES!!! I never thought of that. I knew there was something very distinct about my cookies because of the softness and chewy-ness of it but I coulnd't put my finger on it ... They were like little muffin tops!!! So it's perfect!! I'll call them MUFFIN TOP COOKIES!! I love it!! I was thinking of making my little bundles of goodness as part of my Christmas gifts for everyone. I will bake loads of cookies and get cute little containers to put them in and wrap them all in a nice little bow. How is that? Cute, pretty, handmade/homemade and consumable (if the receivers actually do like the cookies enough to consume them). Yes. It's a plan.

& MAKEUP

So I got very bored because I was having a case of insomnia. I decided to play around with my makeup because I feel I have not really been using them to their full potential. So I conjured up a look. It's not really a look I would wear out because it's very heavy but I'm sure it would look great for pictures. I call it "smouldering" because I used dark pinks, reds, browns and a slight black. I accented even more with a brighter white around the outside rim of the eye and contrasted it with black liquid eyeliner on the top and lower lid.

I don't have the best lighting so it's kinda hard to see just how the makeup really turned out. You can kinda make it out. It's like a smoky eye look but with reds and pinks. I like it! Now I'm thinking of making up a blog with just some of my makeup works. Especially for when I do makeup on my friends!! OoOooo!! Project!!

Proud of My Cookies

2010-10-19T00:11:00.003-07:00

I am hooked on baking cookies. After Bia and I baked those cookies at my BF's house ... I knew I had to look up other recipes and keep trying other types or just try and perfect the most basic chocolate chip cookie. I think I found a pretty good recipe and I changed one thing ... by accident.

It said to put two packages of vanilla pudding mix. I read it wrong and actually put in two pudding cups. Didn't realize that until I finished baking the first batch and read the recipe again. I thought I messed it up but after I took them out ... I was like WOW! They turned out amazing!!

My brother is the biggest critic in my baking and HE ACTUALLY LOVED THEM! "Tastes better than the chocolate chip chunks Ate!" That meant a lot. I'm glad that he loved them! My mom loved them too and she usually has something to say with everything. So I'm glad! Next is for my boyfriend to try them and I know he's going to love them! Yay! I'm so excited! Next ... CRINKLE COOKIES! They look so scrumptious!

Lazer Tag

2010-10-17T23:09:00.003-07:00

Awesome Awesome Awesome time at Lazer Tag tonight! I went with my boyfriend, Rob & Liz, and Alex and played two games. The first game, I came in last but that's because everytime I shot someone, automatically someone would shoot me back and get losing points because of it. Still not bad though. Then the second go around ... OH ... I kicked some ass! I came in second! Rob was the top scorer but I was a close second! I was sooo happy!!

HOLY SHIT though ... It was tiring! Just the end of the FIRST game, everyone was already complaining of how our legs felt like jelly because of all the running and squatting. Plus, the vests were new and more high tech ... AND HEAVIER! So as I moved around, I really felt it all on my hips! Everyone pretty much came to the conclusion that we are all going to be sore tomorrow.

I can't believe how much fun it was though. I don't even remember the last time I went lazer tag. I think it was just a few years ago and the only other time before that was like elementary school! We are all going to try and round up a whole group of people though because the more people the better. So maybe, me, my bf, Rob&Liz, Alex & Ate Jake, Bia, David, Liz's friend Debbie and Michelle, maybe Kari, maybe even Chris might want to come! That would be soooo fun!! Can't wait. Plus Sundays are super super cheap. It's like half price anytime after 6pm. My goodness that was fun!

Ass Kicked

2010-10-08T15:40:00.002-07:00

Wow ... I feel like throwing up. I feel hot, tired, dizzy and I am sweating buckets. Wow .. that was intense and you know what? That was ONLY the warm-up. Isn't that nuts? This Shaun T's Insanity is literally fucking INSANE. It's very very intense but I can see how people can lose weight and be very fit. This workout program pushes you to your limits and can make you driven.

I have to say though this isn't my style. As good as this program would be for me, I don't think I can stick with it knowing just how too intense it is for me. So you know what? I am sticking with HIP HOP ABS. It's a lot of fun and I was getting results from it. It was also not has hard because I didn't stop for any breaks but I was just sweating just as much as Insanity. So that's what I'm going to do. I say just as long as I do SOME exercise, I'm good.

I think I have found my new pretty obsession. I tend to have these little favourite obsession that I go through. Anyways, my new lovely obsession is cherry blossoms. Well ... I have ALWAYS LOVED cherry blossoms (because it is one of my favourite flowers along with lilies) but I have never come to a point where everything I want has to do with cherry blossoms ... kinda like how I am right now with my Hello Kitty (which I am still obsessed with btw ... I don't think that's ever going to stop hahah). So I LOVE cherry blossoms. So pretty, so serene, so Asian ... I love it!

INSANITY!

2010-10-07T19:06:00.003-07:00

I have decided to commit myself to one of the most intense workouts out there - Shaun T's Insanity. My friend, B, already did it and I saw incredible results on her. She also told me how hardcore it was though and that she was practically dying even after JUST THE WARMUP! Wow ... to further validate myself on this insanity, I read reviews of other people who tried it and they all pretty much said that same thing ... that it was hard, intense, they felt like puking, sweating buckets BUT ... incredibly worth it because they were already losing 6 or more pounds AFTER THE FIRST WEEK!! So I am excited ... but at the same time really really really scared because I don't know if my body can handle it.

I want to lose AT LEAST 10 pounds but ideally ... I do want to lose more. I do have an ideal weight that I want to be. I don't know if it is realistic for me to get to that ideal weight but I at least want to get as close as I can to it.

I figure this will be a good workout because I already tried Shaun T's Hip Hop Abs and I was making good progress on it. I did lose a few pounds doing it about 3 times a week. So ... I hope I stick with this and that I can see some results after a few weeks because my target time of looking decent is in December for my boyfriend's company Christmas party and I want to be able to look good in a dress or just look sexy in a really really pretty pant-suit-type outfit.

I'm excited!!

Happy Thanksgiving Canada!

2010-10-05T22:20:00.003-07:00

Yay! Thanksgiving is this weekend and that means ... LONG WEEKEND! Yay! There's going to be such good food because my mom always cooks up a feast for every holiday. Plus ... my mom and I are going to attempt in baking a cake. A chocolate angel food cake, to be exact. This is our first time to bake a bake from scratch so hopefully it turns out successfully.

I have been watching quite a few movies for the last few months (I'd LIKE to think I'm some kind of movie buff now ...). Since I don't really want to elaborate on every single movie I have seen (in theatres and DVD) I'll just rate them out of 5 stars and I will put T (for theatres) and D (for DVD).

Inception [T] - 4.5/5 (amazing mind-fucking concept but it was too long)
Youth In Revolt [D] - 3/5 (not as funny as I thought it would be)
You Again [T] - 4/5 (I actually thought this was absolutely hilarious)
Prince of Persia [D] - 3.5/5 (really good action and enjoyable film but of course it's not one of those epic movies)
Robin Hood [D] - 4/5 - (The one with Russell Crowe; I surprisingly liked this film considering others didn't. There were a few slow moments but I still really liked it)
Leap Year [D] - 2.5/5 - (I normally like to have my occasional chick flicks but this one was quite boring and I didn't feel any dynamic between the two main characters)
Dear John [D] - 3.5/5 - (It was better than I thought but my expections were pretty low even so. Cute movie. That's all)

That's all I can think of for now. I know I watched wayy more movies but I can't remember any at the top of my head. I have more movies to watch so expect a few more movies to be added to that list.

Online Store?

2010-09-30T22:33:00.002-07:00

I've been thinking of selling things online ... still trying to do my research though and figuring out if it's even worth it.

I was researcing Etsy.com and well it is a big name to start with but apparently it gets expensive just because it's apparently a big upkeep to keep up on the top of the charts. It's only 20cents a listing but apparently you have to keep re-listing almost everyday and well ... 20cents can add up. Plus they make a comission and since I'm going to be using paypal as a payment method ... they take a comission as well ... so that kinda sucks.

Then I was researching ArtFire.com and it seems to be better just because you can have a free/basic account where you can sell and list your items FOR FREE and they do not make commission off you! But since it's a new site ... they don't have the big name yet and apparently it's hard for people to actually get a sale ... but since it's free I say why not try it out ?? Should I try it? I don't know.

Confused.

I still don't really know what I would be selling though. I was thinking of doing some e-card stuff like invites and stuff. Where they can send it through online and also be able to print it off in a 4x6 or 5x7. I was also thinking of selling unique hand-drawn tshirts. Or I was also thinking when I get really good at knitting (and when I start crocheting) I can sell some scarves and things ... I don't know ... again.

Confused.

I have some thinking to do!

Fingerless Gloves

2010-09-22T22:49:00.003-07:00

I LOVE KNITTING! It's a great hobby for mr I have to say. I wish I had started this earlier in the summer so that I could have had the time to finish more projects and I could have developed more skills. I've already learned quite a few little things here and there but still a ling way to being a big pro about it.

My current project is a set of fingerless gloves. The new skill that I had just picked (and I am soo excited about it) is how to add in another color! So now I have a couple of stripes in there!! I love it!! I am just hoping that these mittens fit my boyfriend haha. Here's what they look like so far ...

It's only about 5% done but I just wanted to show that I actually now know how to add stripes!! LOL. I'm loving it. I realized having thinner needles does make it look so much nicer because it's knitted tighter. I'll post up what it looks like when it's all finished.

My boyfriend and u just ran into a couple of old friends of mine at Tim Horton's tonight. One of them actually took in our kitten a long long time ago. But ... He just informed us that the little kitty died a couple of years ago!!!! He got run over by a car. Isn't that so sad?! It's so sad to hear that. I thought he was the cutest kitten ever. RIP Sunga.

Salmon and Macaretti

2010-09-20T22:24:00.005-07:00

I have been eating wayyyyy too much lately. It cannot be helped though because such good food were prepared. It's really fun cooking and I have been inspired by Ate Jake to take pictures of the meals I cook so that I can have a nice little collection! It makes me want to cook more and more!!

I am quite proud of my boyfriend though. My baby can cook!! Here is what he cooked for me and, my goodness, was it ever good!! He cooked a perfect honey-glazed salmon with seasoned and caramelized vegetables with mushrooms AND homemade tartar sauce (which was my favourite of the night).

Now I know how to cook salmon because I have never actually cooked fish before. I normally don't like fish but I would eat that meal anytime! He sure has his mother's skills in cooking. I believed him when he said that if there ever was an opportunity he would have been in culinary.

This is what I cooked earlier today. It's the same recipe for my baked macaroni but I didn't use an oven because I had no pan so it's pretty much macaroni with my sweet/tangy version of a Filipino spaghetti sauce. Here it is (too bad you can't see the macaroni) with the pasta covered with the sauce, drizzled around with mozarella cheese and topped off with parmesan cheese. Like I said ... since it's not baked ... I will call it "MACARETTI" haha.

Now next time I have to take a good picture of my infamous dessert - Sex In The Pan. Now that's some good stuff!!

Not Feeling Good

2010-09-16T13:42:00.003-07:00

I am not feeling too good. I'm kinda getting sick but I'm still in the process of trying to fight it. Nyquill was my best friend last night so that I was able to sleep. I'm feeling really sluggish and tired. I don't feel like my sleep really did anything because I just feel drained of energy. I'm thinking it also has to do with my weight. I always feel so heavy. I honestly think I need to lose some weight; not just for my appearance (which would be great btw) but also for my health. I'm really starting to feel it.

It's not a good idea for me to exercise right now though since I'm still trying to fight off my cold. I know that my body needs all the rest it needs to just get rid of the sickness altogether but I'm really wanting to work out in some way. I think I need to start hitting the treadmill or do a few crunches here and there.

I feel a lot of pressure though to lose weight. My parents even had to have a talk with me about my weight. It was quite embarassing because of the way they approached me. It felt like some kind of intervention. Never have I really ever felt that bad about my weight. I know I've whined and bitched about my weight before but never once did I actually feel guilty and remorseful about my weight. It really sucks. Period. I don't like it. I know I shouldn't care about what people think but to constantly have to deal with "interventions" ... it's not a good thing. So when I'm feeling better and when I know I have fully fought off my cold, I'll start working out again. If only the weather wasn't so crazy I would love to talk walks with my boyfriend and Taison. I used to walk him everyday and I was seeing results from that. It just sucks that rain is so unpredictable that when I do feel like a walk, it starts to downpour. Sigh.

I'm almost done knitting my mom's hat. Hopefully it turns out okay. I think I might have made a couple of mistakes already but I'm sure she will find it okay. It's good practice since I'm going to be starting on gloves next. My boyfriend wants me to knit him a pair of gloves so hopefully I do a good job on that.

I realized that I have this little dream of having my own little internet store. Of what? I don't know. I guess I've always wanted to just sell things I make online like shirts, my knitting stuff, my photography, my artwork ... whatever. I've actually contemplated making tshirt designs but I need a lot of equipment to do such a thing. Plus ... it's a little different just because it's not rare for people to have online stores. Practically anyone these days can start one up and it's a lot of competition. I know there's already places like etsy.com that helps you do it on your own as well and when I browsed that site ... there's lots of competition there as well. I need to master a craft that kinda scares me because I am not quite that confident yet. In due time I guess ...

The Oil Trouble

2010-09-13T23:21:00.003-07:00

Had a fun little time tonight as my boyfriend and I helped B with her weird sudden oil spill in her car engine bay haha. For some odd reason, her oil cap disappeared and there was just oil everywhere. Luckily my boyfriend noticed the oil leaking out onto her headlights and luckily we were right next to a Canadian Tire and luckily he knew exactly what to do. Then he spent a good 15 to 20 minutes trying to fix her hood because that too had a problem because it wouldn't close properly. Of course we had to look out for dear B because she's our "sista" haha. Your car is like good spankin' new now B!

I also got to cook a delicious and satisfying dinner tonight for my boyfriend and me. Some good beef shwarma while my boyfriend made his really good Greek salad. He was so happy and I was happy too because I think this is the best shwarma I made! It tasted really good! We both were so full though. He was all nice and bloated when I left haha ... that means it was one hella good meal. Glad to know that he really liked it.

I got myself a circular knitting needle for when I knit other hats. I already started on one to try it out and it's pretty cool! But my main one to concentrate on right now is a hat for my mom because she really liked the one I made for myself. So I'm trying to knit her a pretty little red hat for the winter. Also, my mom said she knew how to crochet and used to make so many doilies back in the day! So I bought her a crochet needle and I am hoping she will teach me how to crochet too! I don't know what is with me and this whole arts and crafts thing but I guess this is my thing. I like making things and enjoying the art of it. Plus I like making things for people. If I get really really good I'll think about going on etsy.com and maybe selling a few things ... ONLY when I feel I am good enough. I am still so amateur right now hahah.

Knitting Mania

2010-09-08T13:46:00.002-07:00

It has been a while since I blogged. It seems my summer was too eventful (not really).

School has started again now and I hate school especially in my predicament, which I care not to talk about because it depresses me. But I have to say at least it will keep me busy.

I have found a new addictive obsession in the arts and crafts ... KNITTING! I don't know how or why this sudden onset of knitting came about but I love it. I have already knitted myself a little cellphone holder and a little beanie hat! Even my mom liked it and is now asking if I could knit her one too. I have too many things I want to try. I've already told B that I would knit her some mittens too (they have to be fingerless mitten though because that's the easiest one I can make right now since I'm just a beginner). Now I want more yarn and I want more knitting needles. I need a trip to Daiso to get more!!

Battle

2010-07-22T11:35:00.002-07:00

Going into battle solo
Fighting strange intrapersonalities
Started with a heavy heart filled with fear

Was softened by blows of overwhelming emotions
I fell hard, I was defeated
Didn't even have a chance to cry
Before I hit the ground

the fight continued
Despite the absence of my consciousness
Honour to myself diminished
I can no longer conquer

Leave me here
Leave me here
Until he battle is over
However long that may be.

Miss My SLR

2010-07-13T01:08:00.002-07:00

Another late night trying to finish some homework that I just don't really grasp quite yet. It seems relatively easy yet I'm stuck. I don't know if it is the sleep deprivation or just blockage of my thinking or could just be a combination of both. Sad because I have to get up in a few hours for my clinical. Fun times. I hope I get a better day at clinical since the last time I had a little bit of a breakdown. First tears shed at clinical because I panicked about giving real medications for the very first time. It really was not too bad though. I just have a habit of panicking. My instructor told me to just relax and take it slow and I ended up doing just fine, despite the fact that my resident refused to finish it and held all of the medication in her mouth and refused to swallow. She must have kept the mouthful in her mouth for a good couple of hours too. Wow. Talk about stubborn.

Other than that, nothing much has changed. Just got to hang out with friends and have a good time. My boyfriend and I got to take his good friend out for a photography day and it really really made me miss my SLR. I ended up taking a few shots on my point&shoot and I really really liked a couple of them. Kudos to Trent for taking some gorgeous shots too! He took a couple of me and my boyfriend and they were sooooo nice! I hope to get copies of them and print them out!! I'll try and work on the ones I took too.

Who Do You Think I Am?

2010-06-24T22:46:00.002-07:00

Here's a poem I wrote during my two weeks of hell because of school and regular stress HAHA. I have had an urge to write poetry lately and here is one result:

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM?

I'm very much alive
But differences lie between inside and out
Tell me which is surviving
You wouldn't know
Even if you could see right through
I hear what you're saying,
"This feeling won't last too long"
But what's too long if I may ask?
'Cause however long it's been
Was enough for me

Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
I'm no superwoman
Don't got enough to keep the justice alive this time

I've always been awake
But it doesn't mean my eyes were always open
I started to hit pavement
And I'm scared to know if I should open my eyes when I come to
I hear what they're saying,
"Reality does this all the time"
So is dreaming useless if I may ask
'Cause it would be nice if I could at least breathe sometimes

Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
I'm no superwoman
Don't got enough to keep the justice alive this time

"We'll hold you up this time,
Take a break from your strenght a while"
I can see my independence waving at me
As I lower my head on this shoulder I'm soaking
But I don't care
I don't care

Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
Who ... do you think I am?
I'm no superwoman
Don't got enough to keep the justice alive this time

Progress

2010-06-24T21:06:00.003-07:00

My nice little mini-break from school is quickly drawing to end (but not quite yet ... at least I still have the weekend). It was nice while it lasted though. I got to have more sleep and I got to enjoy myself doing non-school things like make dessert, aquaint myself with some new shows to get addicted to and just seeing my boyfriend and have some quality time.

So two shows I have been watching non-stop. First it was The Big Bang Theory. HILRIOUS SHOW!!! My goodness, I don't know how I didn't get to know that show a while ago. I already watched all the three seasons it currently has. Just waiting now for more episodes.

Second show ... TRUE BLOOD. I have heard of this show and stayed away from it, to be honest because I thought it was going to be one of those typical vampire shows that obviously suited trend after Twilight. Since I got bored and wanted to follow another show since I am pretty much caught up in every show that I liked before, I decided ... what the hell ... let's give it a try. So far ... it's pretty good I admit. It's definitely more nitty gritty than Twilight that's for sure. It's not so teeny bopper and there's a lot more action in all aspects (not just the fighting part if you get my drift). I can see myself getting into this show really quick. So it's my new show now until I find more shows to get aquainted with. I don't ever really watch TV per se but I manage to watch everything on my laptop so I get around the whole 'not being able to watch tv' deal. So it works out =).

I'm quite proud of myself. My clinical instructor gave me a really really good review for my midterm evaluation during the meeting. She said that she could really see me as a future nurse. "You have GOT to be a nurse because of the way you are," she said to me which shocked me a little because no one who was an actual nurse has actually ever said that to me before. So I was very excited. It's good to know that I was picking the right career for me. It almost meant a lot even more because she is normally a picky/difficult professor. She likes to say what is on her mind and will not hold back even if what she has to say is negative. So that means a lot coming from her. I told my boyfriend all this and he said he was very proud of me so that means a lot to me too. So I hope I continue to do what I'm doing and do it better than last.

Easy Week

2010-06-21T09:28:00.001-07:00

It's been a crazy crazy last couple of weeks. I did get to have a nice shed of light during my birthday weekend which was one of my best birthdays ever. I did get to have my beach barbeque with my friends and had an awesome time. My parents helped me prepare some marinated chicken wings and my boyfriend brought over his portable barbeque and was the cook for the day. A bunch of my friends came and stuffed our faces and tried to burn it off with some volleyball, soccer and the best fun of all ... ultimate. That was tiring. I think we all were feeling like our legs were going to fall off and our lungs were going to cave in. Despite the crazy running and heaving, it was so much fun to be that interactive with everybody. I plan on doing this an annual thing and hopefully it will be just as fun every year.

As for the rest of the crazy ass week, it indeed was hell. Two weeks of non-stop studying, ripping my hair out and mental/emotional breakdowns really did a number on me. I had never been this stressed out about school before and it didn't seem to stop in the slightest bit.

But once again ... a shed of light. This weeks is a lot more easygoing now that most of the midterms are out of the way. I pretty get to have a few days off this week other than a couple of meetings and one redo for a practical exam (which will only take about 20 mins of my day). I have some time now to get myself together, destress, get caught up with school work and just have time to relax! I feel so relieved and like a big boulder has been lifted off my shoulders which feels incredible, you have no idea.

So I'm going to enjoy myself this week and try to figure out ways to not get so worked up. I've actually been trying to research on how to improve my memory too. Being a student with a crazy workload and too much material to fill my head, I want to learn how to be able to retain all that information and actually remember it when it is needed (like fucking exams). Well one of things I am going to try and keep consistent is my method of studying for biology. I'm pretty much going to try and put some time aside every single day (like maybe 30 - 60 mins) and concentrate on biology so that it's a gradual learning process rather than cramming everything in a a few days before an exam. Sounds okay right? I'm still researching on what other focus methods there are too so still working on it. It's a start though.

Not Done Yet ...

2010-06-10T20:17:00.002-07:00

It has been the most stressful week of my life. Saying that ... I wish I could say, "I'm glad it's over" but it's not. I still have another week of hell. I already have a mental breakdown this morning because I was freaking out about biology. I was so tired, sleep deprived (still am), but I tried to study so hard and have been studying for it day and night ... unfortunately it wasn't enough. As soon as I finished the exam today I automatically knew just how badly I did. I concentrated on the wrong things. The parts that I did concentrate on was barely on the exam and that really screwed me over.

But you know what? I'm not that upset. I guess all the stress and emotion was so pushed out of me this morning that I ended being very non-chalant and unresponsive. I guess I pushed it all out of my system. Not to say that I wasn't disappointed though ... I am VERY disappointed but I have decided to not really show it. There's no point. I have realized that I can stress and bitch and make a big deal out of it but really ... who cares? I don't want to depend on people's reactions and sympathy to get through it beceause in the end, who is going to all of this on her own? ME. ME and ONLY ME. A person can tell me "it's going to be okay" all they want but that motivation only goes so far ... I still HAVE to write the EXAM and if comes to it ... I still could FAIL it and then what? I have to deal with it.

Wow ... I'm angsty right now. Well it's expected. I was already saying that I was going to be a little edgy for a week or two just because it is really really stressful. This is the first time I have felt this overwhelmed in a school setting. I have gone through school deadlined and stuff before but NOT TO THIS DEGREE. This is just insane. But we go through hoops and hurdles to get to the finish line right? This is just another hoop and hurdle to get through ... a FUCKING HUGE hoop and hurdle but I'm sure I can cope. I'm going to be nurse ... I'm sure I'm going to be going through worse things than this.

I am soooooooo excited for tomorrow though!!! I get to get my nails done with my good friends and have a nice night out with the boyfriend and all our friends and the next day we get to have an awesome beach barbeque!!!!! I can't wait!!! I hope it's going to be a great birthday!!!

Not Right

2010-06-07T01:57:00.003-07:00

Okay ... so I handed in my paper late. About an hour and a half late. Let's see how that goes. I really screwed myself over with that one and of course no excuses ... It was purely my fault. It's already going to be a stressful next couple of weeks. I can feel it. I just want to get over these next couple of weeks and be done with all the fucking hard school stuff. I'm ready to snap. I'm really stressed out with school. Hopefully it progressively gets better.

I actually just can't wait until my birthday weekend. I think that will be my only shed of light during school hell. I can't wait to pamper myself, be around my awesome friends, canoodle with my boyfriend and just relax. I cannot wait.

Another thing I am about to snap about yet again ... yes ... my weight. I have been referred to as pregnant twice now in a span of a couple of months. WTF?! That's not a good thing at all. I don't want a person thinking I'm pregnant every single fucking month. I got really really really upset about it but sulked about it on my own because I didn't want to show that I was a big baby about it. It's really starting to bring me down now though. I don't think my weight has ever really upsetted me THIS MUCH before. I mean I know I used to be just as chubby before but never have I ever been this depressed about it. That's saying something. I really need to figure out some way to lose some weight. I don't need to be perfect but I just want to stop making people fucking think I'm pregnant with just one look at me. Seriously ... that fucking sucks. I normally don't care that people think I'm a little chunky but to have people constantly approach me now about it and not even say I'm fat but think I am legitimately pregnant ??? SERIOUSLY?!?!??! That's not right. I feel like I'm getting desperate. I don't like that. I don't like that at all ...

Education Kills

2010-06-01T21:14:00.003-07:00

Shit weather. I hate shit weather especially when it's finally June and it's suppose to be hot and sunny. There was sun today ... for an hour. It better be fucking gorgeous when my birthday barbeque comes! I want my damn beach/barbeque day. And probably because I have no alternate plan if it rains. I don't want to be in that predicament.

School stress is slowly killing me. Pretty much too many things are due this week and even more intense things are due next week. I have an exam next Thursday, a practical exam the week after, papers here, papers there, research this, research that, post up weekly assignments here, clinical assignments, clinical research, memorize this, memorize that ... it's fucking nuts and I honestly do not know how I am handling it all. I guess I just need to take it a day at a time. Hopefully I can make it or else I am very tempted into looking at stress pills or something.

You think I would be losing weight stressing out like this ... I still haven't lost a pound yet. Boo. So much for being physically sexy on my birthday ...

I am excited overall for my birthday celebration. I just remembered that I get to do a little make-up session with B next Friday! I miss doing make-up with people and since we are going to be having a little girls day I proposed having all our make-up nicely done by MOI and just feel pretty! I hope I do a good job B!

so-called wish list

2010-05-30T23:36:00.003-07:00

I am trying out this new lotion from Nivea called "My Silhouette". It apparently tones and firms your skin and helps you to look a little bit slimmer. I got it out of the blue and decided to try it out without doing any research on it. Already right off the bat, it smells beautiful. But I decided to look up some reviews for it anyway even though I already tried it out. Surprisingly, most of the reviews for this product are positive ones. Women seems to really love this product and recommend it completely. So I am a little excited and I'll stick with it. Apparently you will really see results in about 4 weeks so hopefully I do. I am really liking it so far. My skins really does feel nicer but I have yet to see any actual changes in the "toning and firming" part of it.

I played a decent game of poker the other night. I didn't win overall but I was quite proud of a few of my runs. One in particular: Ace/King. Was pretty much just down to a few chip so I went all in and played it off as "I might as well go down now since I have nothing left" because I really did not want to waste my hand and take the risk. The pot was huge! Went through all to the end and ended up winning, bringing myself back into the game. It was one of my best plays ever! I don't play poker though lol. It was nothing but a strange phenomenon of luck because I am the biggest poker newbie ever. It was fun nonetheless.

I got to watch "Inglorious Basterds" today. I liked it. It definitely was quirky and strange in its own way but what you do you expect? It's a Tarantino movie ... OF COURSE it's going to be weird. It had its really funny moments and very intense moments that are a little unforgettable. Not bad, not bad.

I am getting excited! It's almost my birthday! I really hope we get to have a beach barbeque! I've always wanted to do that with friends! I was trying to think of things that I want for my birthday and it was really hard to think of things. Here's what I came up for now:

Hello Kitty stuff (anything Hello Kitty ... anything)
Some type of ipod dock
getting my nails done (this is done cause B is taking me already!)
a stethoscope (I THINK my boyfriend is helping me buy this already though ...)
gift cards to clothing/accessory stores
purses
books (one in particular - Jewel's "A Night in Armor")

That's all I can think of ... I really don't want much. I guess I'm one of those people that are really easy to shop for because I'll like anything!

Substance

2010-05-27T10:10:00.004-07:00

As I was laying in bed last night after a grueling few hours of trying to write a measely page and a half "paper", I thought about the people in my life and how I feel very blessed about the relationships I have. I have come a long way because people come and go and how you never know who will stay and who will go. I have confidence in the friendships that I have established over the last couple of years even though the number is quite small. That is all I need really. I would rather have a handful of stable relationships than have dozens of meaningless "friendships" that eventually will not last.

I thought of this because last night it was a simple night with a couple of friends. One of them was my boyfriend's friend who he had not seen in a while and it was so evident just how much the friend missed my boyfriend's company and drove out here to talk and catch up and was genuinely very happy to stick around for a good few hours. I got to have a friend too and we talked like no tomorrow (like we always do). We always have something to talk about and laugh about. It was not a superficial talk either which I appreciated. I like conversations with substance which is probably why I don't have too many girlfriends haha. I'm glad to have a friend that I can be comfortable with, not be judged and can appreciate my company and like-wise with her (I hope ... LOL you know you love me Bia).

Speaking of which, I am very excited for our little girls' day! Kari, Bia and I are going to get our nails did as a birthday gift to me next month. This is kinda the first time that I have not really planned anything out for my birthday but we have a semi-plan and we will see how things go since I've learned that not every plan goes as-planned. So far, after our little nail pampering will be a nice dinner somewhere with close friends and the next day will be (hopefully) an awesome park picnic/barbeque in the sun at Jericho beach! I have always wanted to have a nice beach party with friends so hopefully that gets to happen this year! Got to make my 25th birthday as nice as possible! So we will see what happens over the next couple of weeks!

"By the time I recognize this moment
This moment will be gone
But I will bend the light, pretend that it somehow lingered on"
-John Mayer, Clarity

Value of Touch

2010-05-25T21:39:00.003-07:00

Not too bad of a morning at clinical. I was actually quite nervous the night before which resulted in nothing but two hours of sleep but it really went well. There were challenging moments but overall, it was a good experience and it is something I am going to have to get used to because I'm going to be doing this the entire semester.

One moment that stuck in my mind was when I was helping my resident get dressed. She becomes very resistent when to it comes to certain tasks and likes to grab and hang on to things. There was a couple of moments however where she grabbed on to me. She did not grab on because she was resisting but because she just wanted to. It was more of a comfort grab and she just looked at me and smiled. She then slowly touched my face and smiled even more as if she were in admiration of some sort. It was a nice moment. It made me realize that sometimes these elderly residents value the sense of touch because they do not have much social interaction and sometimes all they need is just a hold of a hand or a touch to show that someone cares. It was a moment of pride so far in my student nursing period of life. We will see what else happens tomorrow morning.

I was so incredibly tired today though. Still am actually. I pretty much took a nap for a good 5 hours and spoiled my plans for doing any sort of homework because I just feel sluggish and lazy. I really do need rest. These past two weeks have just been very tough on me but I do need to get my ass in gear soon though (and soon I mean tomorrow until Sunday) because I have a bunch of assignments due on Friday and another couple due on Sunday ... argh. It's not easy. It's tough and I am trying my best to keep up with it all. I am really trying hard not to stress out so much about school but I am getting there. I think I need something to destress me. Some little de-stress gimmick but I don't know what works. I know my boyfriend's brother-in-law has this rubber/plastic grape thing that he likes to squeeze out of habit when he's worrying or stressing out about something. Some people use those "stress" foam balls, some go on the exercise bike (wish I had one) and yeah ... I need something. I need some kind of de-stresser.

Any ideas?